Don’t Move On Just Yet, I’m Still Here

15 | February 6, 2012

Hello. I’m alive. This is either a relief or a huge disappointment to some of you. As most of you pointed out to me through e-mail, twitter, and facebook I have been AWOL form the blog since December and for that I apologize.

“What happened?”

“Where are you?”

“Are you ok?”

“Damn it lady I need more food.”

“Have you been abducted by Aliens?”

“No seriously, where are you?”

“It was aliens, wasn’t it?”

“I’m a dude I can’t follow recipes, I need more step by step photos. Where did you go.” <- one of my favorites

All words from you that touched me, made me laugh in a dark time, and changed my mind to quit blogging. Yes, I was on the bloggers ledge about to hit the cancel my host button. You see, I didn’t realize how much ISMS gave me a purpose. A drive to find out who I am, where I fit and most importantly the outlet to learn more about my passions (other than the sidekick and her father), cooking and photography. Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it. My old pre-kid career minded self is laughing at that those last two sentences right now as I eat yogurt from the jar with a baby spoon, in pajamas and slippers, while asking myself when the last time I washed my hair was.

No, Charlie from Wisconsin, I was not abducted by aliens but I fell into a little bit of a hole, depression if you want to call it, and with it came immense writers block, fatigue, lack of enthusiasm for it all, and an addiction to the TV show “Weeds” that I recently found on Netflix. Just to get out of bed and go on with the day to day had become a struggle. Before I knew it my camera had gathered and inch of dust, and the creativity I once lived of off escaped the kitchen. Not even my friends or relatives knew as they probably never read this blog anyway so they never knew I had stopped and something was slipping with me.

Now two months later I seem to be climbing out of it all. And although I do have to give some credit to The Husband and to one of my best friends who is currently traveling the world but allways stops for a phone call, a lot of it is because of comments and concerns from complete strangers. Eddie – for giving me one of the best compliments ever, Judith – for your concern, Charlie – seriously I don’t know what to say to that, and Mary F., Mark, Veronica S., Brooke, Shari from Tickled Red, Michelle from Confesions of A Recipe Junkie, and all of you on facebook or twitter who here and there sent messages asking about me, the blog, or life. I’ve never met you but would like to say thanks for the encouragement and concern even when you had no idea if anything was wrong or not. To those who have e-mailed, I promise I will return them in time, as I have a a lot to catch up on.

I’m not one to usually talk about the seriousness of life, too much of a downer sometimes. So letting you in on a weakness of mine is a hard hill to tackle. Just going to have to take this day by day and remember that depression has a tendency to be like an ex-boyfriend who ran off to Cabo with your paycheck and friend but tells you he’s at his sick mother’s for the weekend…it’s pretty much a bold face lier. Time to kick it to the curb. Hopefully, with time I will be back to posting recipes and such in my sock monkey slippers.

So, what have you missed in the last two months? A little bit of this and a little bit of that:

First of all, a few weeks before Christmas I lost my beloved and beautiful Grandmother. She was an amazing woman who taught us all the importance of family, unconditional love, fun, and to always dance. This is one of my favorite pictures of her. I miss her dearly.

 

With Christmas came Christmas cards and needless to say it was a tragically painful shoot.

Christmas was a hard one this year with my Grandmother’s passing and my brother deployed in Afghanistan but her smile kept me going.

I’ve cooked a little and have a wonderful review of Texmati Rice, a long grain American Basmati rice, and a lemon chicken, artichoke, and rice casserole recipe coming very soon.

Great news came at the beginning of January, and my brother, Michael, is back in the states stationed at Fort Knox.

We recently spent time at my family’s ranch where I picked up the camera again for the first time in a month.

I took so many shots in fact that Mia gave me this lovely look while saying, “Lady Mommy put the camera down!”

and I did but not before I took this shot of my favorite people and our furry kid, Jack.

While we were at the ranch, we went hunting and were blessed with a massive deer that will feed us all year. Thankfully, my husband is a better shot than I am. At some point I’ll post this recipe for Venison Wellington with a venison mushroom gravy.

Speaking of The Husband, the other weekend he completed his 10,000th marathon and not to mention a 50 mile trail ultra marathon a couple of days ago. Ok maybe not 10,000th but it was up there. I again broke out the camera which made me realize how much I missed it.

Because with a camera you have an excuse to take shots of anyone.;)

Which brings us to yesterday, and we are all still disillusioned that the Giants won the Super Bowl.

Cheers to you all and thanks for the encouragement. Here’s to a fantastic 2012.

    Comments

  • Regina Edwards


    I am so glad you are back! I’ve missed you and your yummy food! I know I have been fighting the big D word too and have since abandoned my blog and a lot things. Sometimes life just gets a hold of you and won’t let go. Sometimes you just want to run away from life…. yeah.

    and I can’t wait for the lemon chicken, artichoke, and rice casserole! Looks amazing. or maybe I am just CRAZY hungry right now from my diet? either way… yumm!

  • Three


    Love you!! Miss you bunches. I’ve been in that dark hole many times. Hope to see you soon!!

  • Emily


    Oh we read it…you silly girl. We just never want to be the people you ever feel that you are disappointing. We love you endlessly and feel your pain. Glad you are back!!!

  • Laurie {Simply Scratch}


    Meredith! I’m so glad your back! I just figured you were off for the holidays, but I’m glad to see you are back with a vengeance. I’m so so sorry to hear about your grandma, that picture of her is stunning :) I love reading your blog and have for a while. Maybe one day we’ll meet… but until then stay strong, and don’t forget you are loved!

  • Evie


    Thanks for sharing so honestly. I know many of us can relate on some level with what you’ve been through. It’s hard to climb back … be patient with yourself. However, we will look forward to more posts from you!! :)

  • the husband


    It’s always pictures of the firefighters, isn’t it? :)
    Glad you’re back at it, sweetie.

  • Kim


    I read your blog and I am your friend!! Glad you are feeling better. Will see you tomorrow when you get back.

  • Sandra


    Glad to see that you’re back Meredith. I’m looking forward to see more of your posts. I hope you’re feeling better now. I have close family who have gone through depression and it’s very tough, so I understand how difficult it has been for you. I’m also sorry to hear about your grandmother, just always keep the good memories and remember her with joy. Can’t wait for your next recipe :)

  • Andrea


    I just love your blog and am so glad you decided to keep it going. Your blog inspired me to make my own baby food for my daughter. Best idea EVER. Your instructions were easy to follow and I liked knowing exactly what was put into her meals. Can’t wait for more recipes…for adult and baby :)

  • Marie Valum


    I am praying for God to send some of His Amazing Grace to you..

  • Jennifer | Mother Thyme


    So happy to hear all is well and you are back! You have such a delightful site and I always look forward to see what you are whipping up. I heard about your Grandmother, my condolences again. I figured you were taking some time off to get back on track, especially after the holidays. Hang in there, and take your time. We’ll all still be here when you get back up and running! :)

  • Tickled Red


    Gurl! Okay don’t kill me but I’m trying so hard not to laugh right now. Not at you of course, but the dork typing this {muwa}. I just assumed that you had be sucked into the dryer of life. Spinning around until you eventually popped out. I am truly sorry that you lost your dear grandma :( If you lived a wee bit closer I would come hug you and feed you and make silly faces at you until you ordered the man of steel to kick me out on my tush. I’m thrilled though that you brother is home safe and sound and that are feeling the sunshine on your soul again dear friend. It may dim but it will never leave you, promise :D xoxo

  • Sara


    Hello! I just stumbled onto your blog, and your recipes (what I’ve read so far) sound delicious… so I’m glad you are back at the blogging!

    I am DYING to get my hands on your venison wellington recipe. My dad got a deer this year too, and I have some venison tenderloin in my freezer that I have no idea what to do with! Any ideas would be much appreciated!

    Also, congrats to your husband on his marathon and ultra marathon. I’m reading Born to Run right now, and the topics in the book seem to be jumping out at me everywhere now.

    • In Sock Monkey Slippers


      Sara – you are reading my husband’s running bible! He loves that one. I’m hoping to get that recipe out soon. It’s a good one! -Cheers

  • Andrea Nogues


    You are so freaking awesome, I´m doing some back reading on your site since I just discovered you a couple of days ago :) I´ll have you know you are being read in Paraguay- South America! I don´t know you, but I am very proud of you! Keep yo head up girl! This post made me cry, smile and reminisce.
    You are one of my new fave reading material!
    xoxo

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